I'm in Da Money!!

YaaaaaaaaaY!!  I finally got a settlement offer on my lawsuit...Check this out people.. I am by no means a litigious person but, on the eve of Thanksgiving 2008 I'm cookin' my greens, my pies, my whatever it is we eat... So, the filipino and I go out to get us all something to eat.. What do kids want? You know it!!  McDonalds!  So, we jump in the car and hit our friendly neighborhood Mickey D's..I'm lazy so, i go straight to the drive-thru, el hubo says, we may as well go inside cuz there's no line there.. I"m like okay.. I hit reverse and lean to the front parking lot..We walk in, order our food.. You know, the regular stuff.. Burgers, Nuggets, Fries... DRINKS!  So, he pays, they hand him the cups.. He takes half and gives me the other half...I do one drink and place it to the side...Then I place the cup to the ice dispenser and Baaaaaaaaamm! Whatchu think happened!?!  The top of the soda fountain machine don' fell on the top of my head.... As soon as it hit i said, "Ooooooooowwww!! I need a workers comp claim!  I need an incident report!"  There was a black lady in line when it happened and she's lookin' at me like, 'sista, you need a witness!?!' I'm lookin' @ her like, do you see a car?  And no!  U just want in on this!  Anyhoo..Appx 3min have elapsed and i don't see noooobotee! Finally, the black manager comes out wit a blank piece of computer paper and says, "Write your name and phone number here and our insurance carrier will get in contact with you?!"  What!?!?  Is this a blank piece of paper forreal!?! WTH!?!? Hmmmm?  I know yal trippin' cuz you see you ain't hear me say that she asked how i was, right!?!  Right!  Anyway.. I don't really get down wit this cuz I'm a former union steward and i know my rights.. And this don't look too good to me!  So, then the head manager comes out cuz that manager has customers to serve. She's a short hispanic lady and she's says, "Can u write down what happened on here and the date too!?"  Sure, I wrote, "ON NOVEMBER 26, 2008 @ APPX 9PM, I CAME INTO MCDONALDS TO BUY SOME FOOD. WHILE MAKIN MY DRINKS THE TOP OF THE SODA FOUNTAIN MACHINE FELL AND HIT ME ON THE HEAD AND IT HUUUUUUUUUUUUURTS!"  She says thank you and has the AU-DA-CI-TY...100 hunnet hours later she says, "Does it hurt, are you okay!?!"  If yal ain't fig'd it by now, I have a smart a$$ mouf!  I said, "No!?  I mean, how many people you know that would get hit upside the head with the stainless steel top of the soda fountain machine and it not hurt!?" Doofus!  She nods her head @ me and said, "Oh yea, i know!?"  So, I'm questioning her as to what's the next step in the process and why there isn't an incident report that i would get a copy of and she says, "Don't worry they'll contact you." So, I'm a clever girl.. So, just in case they acted like i ain't never give them that paper with my information on it...I get home and call them and ask them to fax it to me.. Ha!  Gotcha!  They fax it and e'rything is e'rythang!  I think nothing else of it since it's the holiday weekend...So, the weekend passes and no word...I'm out doing what i do best(shopping @ Ross) and i get a call from the insurance company...It is 12:15pm...Hurry.. Quick! Quick!  I'm barkin' wolf tickets...Sellin' it tellin' her abt my headaches, how i have an appt today and so on and so forth...She tells me to follow up with her when i'm done with treatment.. Sure, okay, no problem..I hang right up with her and dial Kaiser.. "Ummm yes, i need a same day appt for being injured in the head @ McDonald's?" "Okay ma'am lets see, it's 1:08 now, i have an appt here in Vallejo @ 1:30, can you make that?"  "Yuuuuuuuuuup!"  I walk the heyell away from my buried treasures i don' found at da Ross and hit the way way to Vallejo!  I make it.. Don't trip.. My Dr. ordered a CT-SCAN for the following day.. So, finally after Dr visits, CT-SCAN, drugs & many migraines later... I called these people today about my $$$$$$!  Yal know he tried to low-ball me @ 1st.. Then i hit 'im wit the, "I'll have to consult someone else about this matter!?"  "O, no how much do you want?  What can i offer you to get this settled today!?! I wanna hurry up and get this closed out..I can fax the settlement offer over to you and u can sign it and fax it back and i can get a check cut 2mrw!" Check?!?!??.. Hmmm.. MACBOOK...MACBOOK..."Here's my fax #!"  WooooooooooHooooooooooooo!!!  I ain't look back!  Unfortunately, do to contractual constraints I am not privy to divulge the details of the settlement offer!  LOL!!! Yal know I'm lyin'!  I jus don't want yal lookin' for me in the daytime wit a flashlight!  Deuces!